Following on from yesterday

Am, I ready to be ME?????????? YES I AM!!!!!!! It basically comes down to what I want and not anyone else can drive that. Yesterday I was going to go to the gym with friends, and then they rang to say that they couldn't go......did I go on my own cos I wanted to.......NO!!!!!!!!!! We arranged to go today instead, so I rang this morning, and something has come up for them, and they can't go................ am I going to let that stop me going? NO!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am doing this for ME!!!!!!! I am the only one who can do this for me, I can't do it for you, like you can't do it for me. 

I have been watching videos alot over the last couple of days, mainly on you tube of people like Rosemary (from yesterday's post) and Miss Janie.......I also went back and rewatched a few of my own videos, which made me sad, as even back in April 2009, I was struggling:- sure that was before my diagnosis of my auto immune liver disease. 

So, I am going to do this for ME, and I will not quit, I will keep going, no matter how long it takes, and I will live for ME everyday, and I will celebrate ME, the ME I am today, not the ME I think I want to be. If I honor who I am today, and live for ME today, then I will succeed!!!!!

Here is a clip from Miss Janie about regain. The bit that really gets me is towards the end, where she asks:

"what is it that YOU want, not what anyone else wants or what anyone else thinks is right, WHAT do YOU want, what is going to make you happy?"

So what do I want? I want to be healthier, which actually means doing that......not just saying I want it, but following through with the choices I make for ME. It means cutting back the carbs, drinking the water, getting in some exercise and getting out and living, instead of sitting back on the couch just watching life go past. I am going to get out there and participate in life again!!!!!!! I somehow lost the want to participate. But I have found it again. It means posting more, it means putting more videos up but more importantly it is about living life for ME and what I want!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Are you ready to be YOU?

The following is a video from Gastric Rose. It made me cry. She is now about 7 years post op from her Gastric Bypass and she is amazing!!!!!

Today she asked the question : Are you ready to be YOU?
Well are you ready to stop comparing yourself to others and their journey, or their body shape,their exercise regime, their health, etc etc etc - or are you ready to accept you for who and where you are and to move and YOUR pace, eating the things that work for YOU. 

So there you are, I am ready to move forward on MY journey, and it will take as long as it takes. I am going to move at the gym at least 3 times per week and I have to accept that my body does not like Gluten, even though I try and push those limits. I know that I need to stop looking at everyone elses journey, and just concentrate on my own. For me that is a big part of why I separated out my Facebook friends, as sometimes it is easy to look at what everyone else is doing and forget about what I need on MY journey. 

Would love some feedback on what you thought of Roses video. 
 

This is so true

Thanks to my friend Tim for posting this. At the end of the day that is the reality for all things we do. 


Enough said

Another Lunch Box - More Protein

Yesterday's lunchbox was great but I either did not have enough protein for breakfast, or there was not enough in the lunch itself as I was so hungry by around 4pm. I was on a late start and finish yesterday so didn't get home to cook dinner till around 7:30pm so ate late last night. 

So I have upped the protein in the lunchbox today. Here it is 

It is a home made Gluten Free Scotch Egg in the clear container,
Yellow - Mixed bean and feta salad
Blue - Shaved ham
Red - cut up gerkins
Green - 1 cut up Kiwifruit. 

I have the kiwifruit and the gerkhins at morning and afternoon tea. Today will be a very rushed lunch that I will most likely eat at my desk as I have to go to my specialist appointment. I have not been happy with my blood test results, but yesterday they decided to play the game and dropped dramatically. May be that the stress of the conference organising is almost over. 

Today is also my Friday at work, so looking forward to being off and doing the last minute things before the weekend. 


Off to work now, hugs. Janine

I

An Idea taken from Eggface

I have been following a blogger in the WLS world for some time, Her name is Michlelle Vicari, and her blog is The World According to Eggface and she has some amazing ideas. One of the things she often does is posts her lunchbox and the contents. I think this helps make her more accountable. 



Anyway I decided to do it today and I could really see that what I was having and that I was getting in a good variety without overdoing anything. 

Here is my lunch for today! (including a couple of snacks)


Blue box - kiwifruit
Green - 3 slices shaved ham 
Red - 5 slices cucumber and 1 hardboiled egg
Yellow - 2 but up gerkhins
clear - salad, with radish, cucumber, yellow pepper and feta.


So there you have it - lunch today. 

Okay so home, and just had dinner, although I have to say I don't think I had enough protein for breakfast as I was so hungry I demolished the above before lunchtime. 

Came home and opted for a high protein meal of homemade Gluten Free Scotch eggs and a mixed bean with Feta Salad. (even the coating is GF -it is a Rice Based coating) I think I will be taking a Scotch Egg for lunch tomorrow.

Tomorrow sees me at my last day of work for the week and then I have the prep for the conference on Wednesday and Thursday before Katie arrives at 5pm. I know I have a hair appointment at 9am on Wed and I was thinking about getting my nails done as well. I also have an appointment with Simon at lunchtime on Wednesday, otherwise I will be at home working on the presentation for Sunday, and getting the final details done for the conference.

I WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I won the award for Favourite International WLS Personality!!! So cool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I even wrote and acceptance speech, which was read out on the Bariatric TV Post Awards Radio Show. 

Thanks to Diva Taunia for organising the awards and to the whole of the community who have embraced this chick from New Zealand, who to most of you probably speaks way to fast and has a funny accent.

Through Diva Taunia, the guys at BTV, and so many of you in the you tube community, you inspired me to stand up and be vocal about my own journey, and to bring more support and resources to New Zealand. Since getting to know you all, I am about to pull off the second Weight Loss Surgery Conference in New Zealand, and none of that would have happened if I had not stumbled across this wonderful community.

I have not been able to meet any of you in person yet, but I know that I will someday when I can finally afford to get to the Meet & Greets in Las Vegas. If any of you ever want to come to New Zealand my home will always be open to anyone from our wonderful community.

Thanks again, I am humbled and I wish I could be with you.

Things are a bit frantic here this week. I have heaps to do with the conference, and Katie Jay is just about on her way. I am expecting a text from her in about 5 hours to tell me she is on the way to the airport. I just can't believe the next time I speak  to her, she will be in Rotorua!!!!and I still hve to wait till Thursday 17th to finally meet her. 

Well must head to bed so I can get through tomorrow and Friday, then the weekend will be busy with conference stuff as well as getting the back yard ready for the Annual Harris Christmas party which is being held at my house for about 60 of my relatives on Dec 3rd. Man, I can't wait till Dec 5th to actually relax, although I think that is the day I have scheduled to start at Jetts gym, which have kindly given 3 gym memberships to me to give away at the conference. 

Will update some more around the conference time, especially with some photos.

I just don't get it

Doing everything most things right and I go up in weight to 118.4 kgs.......I so don't get my body!!!!!!

The only thing I have not really managed to do this week is to get the water intake in, and do as much exercise as I had hoped, but I did get some in. I am so not sure what is going on, but I will keep going, as if I give up, It would just pile on!!

Anyway, off to get more done on the conference organising, getting to the final couple of weeks now. I only have two full weeks at work. Katie will arrive on Nov 11th and I am so looking forward to being able to spend some time with her.

Have a fantabulous day!!!!!

Track your progress.....

So here I am tracking my progress, I wasn't going to do it, but then I picked up Katie Jays Small Bites book, and Today's topic is just that.....Track your progress. 

So I thought I had better. 

So over the last couple of days, since I posted about getting back on track, I have actually 95% of the time stuck to it. I had a couple of rice cookies on Tuesday night and yesterday was on track. 

My water consumption is still too low and the exercise is just not happening. But small steps as they say and certainly in the right direction and I have done my typical drop 600 gms already, but now it will most likely stay that way for  the rest of the week, which usually gets me down, and then I fall off track. But, I am not going to do that!!!!!

Things are coming together nicely for the conference. I can't believe Katie arrives in New Zealand in just over two weeks!!!!! So, if you are waiting to register!!!!!!! DO IT!!!!!!!!!

Restarts today

Yup - I am restarting today, healthy eating and getting back 100% on track.

My boss pointed out to me on Friday that I have told her I have gained weight but that I think that I will only lose a portion of it..........she asked me why I think that, as surely if I put my mind to it I can do anything!!!!!!!!

So today, back 100% on track with both Gluten Free and with my WLS eating plan, the water and the cutting out the junk. I will also be back on track with exercise soon, just working on that plan. 

Anyway, this morning, 

Pills taken, 
1 cup of tea with milk and sweetener (not sugar)
About to head to work for the day, Protein shake at around 10:30, and then lunch at 2pm, which will be 1 orange, 2 corn thins and a small can of tuna with lemon pepper. 

I will have my calcium


Dinner when I get home will be 

Beef Hot pot casserole (in the slow cooker now) 
Maybe a little mashed potatoe (but just a little)



And I will get my water intake in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


There is only downwards from 117.5 kgs (this mornings weight)

So here it is.....drumrolls not needed

My weight is sitting at 116.8 kgs as at this morning. Now this is just soooooooooo not acceptable, considering I got down to 101 kgs before getting sick with my Auto Immune Liver Disease. 

Sure, I am still on immune suppressants and steroids, but that doesn't account for the garbage I have been putting in. So I am getting back on that train......actually I am concentrating for the moment being Gluten Free and trying to reduce carbs. (having much more protein)

I tried a recipe that Lynda had on her blog, a pizza base that is made from cauliflower and it is not bad. I don't think I cooked it at quite the right temperature as it did not really go crispy, but certainly it was fine, and you get so much more flavour from the toppings as it is not over powered by the bread. I had chicken and bacon on mine. 


The other thing I am having is cauliflower rice.....(the first stage of the pizza) instead of regular rice when it comes to curries etc. We had it tonight, I didn't miss the rice at all!!!!!!!!!! I did still have one poppadoum, but as it is made from Lentil flour, it is fine for me.


I am planning on getting out and moving more, nothing drastic, just using what is around me, ie the footpath and walking tracks around here and if it is wet then and old WW DVD I have. I am going to be trying to record what I am doing daily....not adding calories or anything, just making me more aware, and if I  gain or stay the same I can look back at it . 

So today was a bit of a mixed bag as I made cheesecake for dessert


Breakfast 
Eat Me Protein Shake with yoghurt and milk


Morning tea
Two Wheat Free Rice Cookies 


Lunch 
1 small can of lemon pepper tuna
2 corn thins
1 kiwifruit 
1 pear


Afternoon Tea
Two Wheat Free Rice Cookies

Dinner
Chicken, chickpea and lentil Curry
1 poppadom
2 tablespoons of rice cauliflower
1 small piece of raspberry cheesecake made with GF biscuits
1 tablespoon of low fat boysenberry ice-cream
1 handful of salted potato chips
1 coke zero can 
1 small glass of grape juice. 


Now I have major hiccups and I am off to bed. Waiting for my you  tube video to post, but it won't be ready till the morning. So good night, and happy dreams. !!

I have an idea.

I have a huge idea.......as many of you know, I really want to go to the next WLSFA Meet & Greet in Las Vegas next year in May, but with the budget the way it is, that is unlikely to happen!!! So how do I make it happen!!!! How do I get to be here

I have been thinking....I am useless at saving, but what can I do to get here, that is not only raising money but also getting healthier and I thought about, what if I was to find people willing to sponsor me to get back on track and shed this extra weight that has crept on. Maybe sponsoring me $10 per kg I manage to get off. I would only need 10 people to do that if I was successful in getting back down to 99 kgs, and it would pay the airfares!!!!!

So I am really thinking about doing that. Will see what happens over the next couple of weeks, as I plan if it is possible. I guess if I can find enough people, I could even make it $5 per kg, and if I could find a corporate sponsor who would be willing to help would be fantastic!!!!

I would love some ideas about how I can make it to Las Vegas people!!!

Proposed agenda for the 2011 WLS Conference

Weight Loss Surgery New Zealand 2011 Conference

18-20th November, Palmerston North Conference Centre

Registrations are going well but we would love to see more of you at the conference. 

We have multiple options when it comes to ticket prices, just check it all out
on the registration page at http://www.weightlosssurgery.co.nz

Full Attendance
Friday night mix & mingle; Saturday conference from 9am including lunch, tea & coffee; Saturday night Gala dinner and entertainment; Sunday breakfast and final session with Katie Jay
$130 

Saturday Conference & Dinner
Saturday conference from 9am including lunch, tea & coffee; Saturday night Gala dinner and entertainment
$100 

Saturday Conference only
Saturday conference from 9am including lunch, tea & coffee
$70 

Partners Conference ticket
Friday night mix & mingle; Saturday night Gala dinner and entertainment; Sunday breakfast and final session with Katie Jay
$70 

Partners Saturday Dinner only
Saturday night Gala dinner and entertainment
$40 

All of these can be paid by installment arrangement and we provide the bank account once you are registered. If you are having difficulty in registering please contact me on 06 3582247 so I can do it on your behalf. 

Proposed Schedule for 2011 WLSNZ Conference 

FRIDAY 18 NOVEMBER 2011

6.00pm Registrations open; mix & mingle at the Conference Centre (wls friendly nibbles provided)

Testimonials – open microphone – those who wish to speak are welcome 

SATURDAY 19 NOVEMBER 2011

8.30am Registrations open 

9.00am Welcome to 2011 Weight Loss Surgery New Zealand Conference 

9.30am Katie Jay – Key note speaker from the USA - (topic to be advised) 

Katie Jay is the director of the National Association of Weight Loss Surgery (NAWLS) and the author of 'Dying to Change", "Small Bites - Daily Inspirations for Weight Loss Surgery Patients" and her recent publication "Katie Jays Weight Loss Surgery Stages of Transformation: What to expect & how to manage change after Bariatric Surgery". 

10.30am Morning tea (Clothing swap now open for the duration of the
conference) 

11.00am Romela Quinn-McLelland – Gold Director – Usana Health Sciences Testimonial from the Gold Sponsor of the WLS NZ 2011 Conference 

11.15am Usana Health Sciences video about their USA Bariatric Centre 

11.30am Diana Burgess is a qualified naturopath with practices in Kerikeri, Bay of Islands and Whangarei. She specializes in endocrine dysfunction, helping women rebalance hormones and improve overall health and well being, including fertility and weight loss issues. She also now offers phone consultations and is a speaker who is very passionate about educating and helping both men women achieve optimal health. Diana also contributes as an adviser to the medical advisory council for Usana Health Sciences inc, and is well respected throughout the international Usana network.

12.30pm Lunch – WLS friendly lunch provided 

1.15pm Katie Jay – 2nd Session (topic to be advised) 

2.15pm Breakout sessions – Proposed topics:

- Pre-op/Newly Post-op
- Post-op and struggling with regain
- Lap-band patients 

3.15pm Afternoon tea 

3.30pm Gorgeous Getaways – two testimonials from WLS / plastic surgery
patients 

4.15pm To be advised 

4.45pm Final wrap up of the day 

5.00pm Saturday conference finishes 

6.00pm Pre-dinner drinks at the Conference Centre 

6.30pm WLS friendly dinner (jazz singer in the background) 

7.30pm Trudi Bennett – Wardrobe Flair 

8.30pm WLS friendly dessert 

8.45pm Vendor/sponsor giveaways 

9.15pm Dancing/socialising (with dee-jay) 

11.00pm Close up Conference Centre for the night 

SUNDAY 20 NOVEMBER 2011

9.30am WLS friendly Breakfast at the Conference Centre 

10.30am Formation of national WLS organisation 

11.00am Katie Jay - final session (topic to be advised) 

12.30pm Conference finishes 

We also have some amazing giveaways again this year and to be able to get some of those you need to be attending the dinner on the Saturday night.

Some great products...

Things have been really busy this week, but I have managed to stay on the train!! YAY for me. 

A little worried that we haven't got enough numbers for the conference, but if worst came to worst I am sure we would be able to cut back on some of the venue costs etc. I think it will be okay, but if you are intending on coming to the conference can you please register at http://weightlosssurgery.co.nz 

I also decided that with my blog as I mentioned before I am going to start reviewing some WLS products. These maybe things that I have actually tried or maybe even things that I find in our extended communcity that I would love to have here in NZ. 

The first of these is Slimpressions® Shapewear I have included a link on the side for you to click on. The one product I would love to try is 'the Have Not's' as they scoop under the bustline, and they have arm compression. Which means that my flabby horrible upper arms would be contained. The also have a chocolate brown so not your standard undergarment colour




Slimpressions® Shapewear  have emailed me and said that they hope to send through a couple of their products to give away at the conference. So if you want to know more or to find out if you can win the $500 worth of their products, click on the box above. (I am not sure if it is open to New Zealand people but maybe worth a look anyway since our $ is so good and it makes the prices not sure extreme)

Getting back on the train.

As I mentioned in my last post by blood results have been going in the wrong direction, well, they still are, but I think I have a handle on it. I have had a cold over the last couple of weeks, but I am over that now as well. 

I weighed yesterday morning, and it said 115.1 kgs, which was bit better than a figure I saw last week. I have gotten back in touch with some people in the US who inspire me greatly and they have started up a FB group called Accountabilibuddies and it is a place where you can help each other and support each other without judgement. So I am using that tool, and also getting back into the support that the you tube community also gives me. 

So how does that relate to a train? Well I watched the following video, and Gastric Rose is so right, the train is still there on the track, it is just me that has gotten off at a station along the way for a look see around and I have losst my way back. So now I know where the train is, I got to catch it.  Here is her video:

Also AJ, who is one of my accountabilibuddies. 

So there you are, a couple of people who through their journeys are helping me through mine. I can either sit back and slide down the slippery slope and regain, or I can find my way back to the train and at least be on track to acheiving my goals, even if at times it feels like the train has stopped or going slowly.

I'll be posting updates and also some reviews of products or recipies that I find along the way. I am going to kick start myself, (although I am not sure the new gluten free raspberry slice is a good way to go, but certainly a little better than what I have been doing).




 

Pressure is on

So, obviously I have not kept up with the Daily Bites, and I think that I need to stop these for the time being as I am not coping with too much on my plate. 

We moved in May and then went on holiday. Came back from it and just got stuck into everyday life and the start of organising the next WLS Conference. This is not going as smoothly as last time, possibly because people have expectations, and we have also upped the anti by having an international speaker in Katie Jay. (who wrote the Small Bites).

I also think that because of the Small Bites, I lost some of my personality in my blog, and I certainly noticed that people stopped commenting, and providing the support that I know I need atm. So I won't be updating the same way for a while, it will be more personal instead of the small bites.

Healthwise things have gone a bit pear shaped...I am still on steroids and unfortuately I have gained around 15kgs over the last two years. Not happy about that at all and I know that a big part of that gain is actually me not eating correctly for either my gluten free or for my surgery.  I seem to have lost a lot of motiivation there and it becomes a big circle of not coping. The second immune suppressant has failed and they have now got me on a third one and it is taking a while for my body to accept the new regeime.

We still don't know anything about our on-going work situation, so the best we can do is just take that day by day till we know what happens. I am not too worried about it for the meantime and we will get plenty of warning of any changes.


We are still undergoing the process of fostering, it can take a while, and with moving it certainly delays things a bit but still looking forward to hopefully one day being able to help a little one. 

The conference planning is going well, a little slower than last year as we have more of a committee approach to the planning, which of course slows things down. Also we have a couple of hiccups with one of our speakers and I have had to find a replacement at short notice. But all good, and roll on November. 

Well, that is probably enough for now, it has taken a couple of hours to write in between the phone, facebook and watching telly with my hubby. catch you again soon.

Make that big decision

The NAWLS Small Bite for today is

Make that big decision. 

A decision to change your life is a big step, not easily taken. It is something you need to take time to consider. A big decision needs to be made in a moment of true consciousness, when you are able to see clearly what you are doing, and what the outcome of your actions will be. In that moment, you can acknowledge where you are and decide to change your course.  


If deep down you know you need to make a big decision, you can start the process. Change can be scary, but if you make your decision as an outgrowth of being in touch with yourself and your true needs, you won't go wrong. Have courage.
 
Action for the day: 
In your journal, write about a decision you need to make. Spend some time thinking about your decision and defining it. Then, MAKE IT. 


© 2007, Katie Jay. All rights reserved.

So today I have had two shakes, one for breakfast and one for lunch. Everything was going fine, but I have had wicked headaches and nose bleeds, so I went to the Dr's today, and they think that I am fighting off a virus. Si made a lovely beef Risotto from scratch and we ate quite early. So this evening I ended up having something else. Will see how I go tomorrow.

New Plan of Action.

So here we are, getting higher and higher. I definately need a new course of action. I need to get back to around the 100kgs. I mean I had lost over 75 kgs and then I got sick with the Auto immune Liver disease and went onto steroids, but honestly, the weight gain is more to do with what I have been shoving in my GOB. So I have to get back to basics and that is what I am going to do. Two shakes a day and a regular meal in the evening. I will still have rice and potatoes but limit it to a couple of days per week, and concentrate more on protein based meals.

I will post on here and also do a you tube update at some point over the weekend. I am also working on the next Weight Loss Surgery New Zealand Conference that is going to be held in Palmerston North on Nov 18th -20th. We are hoping to have an amazing international speaker who is very special in the WLS community. I am in the process of working on the sponsorship opportunities, and there is some very exciting new products available in the US that I am hopefully that I will be able to get some samples send down. 


I will also try and post some new pics of the house at some point and also the clothes that I got from the recent Undercoverwear party that I hosted. When they arrive that is. 

Slow Down

The NAWLS Small Bite for today is

Slow down. 
Life can get hectic. Sometimes things are out of your control and you just have to do the best you can. Other times things are stresses you bring upon yourself. Your new life after WLS needs to be based on balance and a commitment to take care of yourself like never before. Too much stress can increase your appetite. Is that what you really want? 


A very wise person once prayed, "Lord, grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Amen to that. 
 
Action for the day: 
Evaluate your schedule. Is there anything you can cancel? Is there someone you can ask to help? Be brave today and take control of your schedule based on your long-term health goals.

© 2007, Katie Jay. All rights reserved.